We all mess up sometimes. So why is learning to forgive yourself a lot harder than forgiving others?
Think back to the last time somebody apologized to you about something. Did you forgive them? There is a very good chance that you did...
Everyone messes up. Me, you, the neighbors, Mother Teresa, Mahatma Gandhi, King David, the Buddha, everybody.
It's important to acknowledge mistakes, feel appropriate remorse and learn from them so they don't happen again. But most people keep beating themselves up way past the point of usefulness: They're unfairly self-critical.
There is a kind of inner critic and inner protector inside each of us. For most people, that inner critic is continually yammering away, looking for something, anything, to find fault with. It magnifies small failings into big ones, punishes you over and over for things long past, ignores the larger context and doesn't credit for your efforts to make amends.
Therefore, you really need your inner protector to stick up for you: to put your weaknesses and misdeeds in perspective, to highlight your many good qualities surrounding your lapses, to encourage you to keep getting back on the high road even if you've gone down the low one, and frankly, to tell that inner critic to shut up.
Know that despite your flaws, you are okay as you are. Your flaws, rather than making you “less” of a person, are what make you who you are. What you think of as a defect actually makes you far more interesting to others.
You are not perfect. You make mistakes.
But you are also on a path of growth. Your mistakes and failures help you improve. As flawed as you may be, you must accept yourself, flaws and all, if you are to make progress in your life...
It's Okay to mess up, screw up and break up... Forgive yourself & Move on!
Think back to the last time somebody apologized to you about something. Did you forgive them? There is a very good chance that you did...
Everyone messes up. Me, you, the neighbors, Mother Teresa, Mahatma Gandhi, King David, the Buddha, everybody.
It's important to acknowledge mistakes, feel appropriate remorse and learn from them so they don't happen again. But most people keep beating themselves up way past the point of usefulness: They're unfairly self-critical.
There is a kind of inner critic and inner protector inside each of us. For most people, that inner critic is continually yammering away, looking for something, anything, to find fault with. It magnifies small failings into big ones, punishes you over and over for things long past, ignores the larger context and doesn't credit for your efforts to make amends.
Therefore, you really need your inner protector to stick up for you: to put your weaknesses and misdeeds in perspective, to highlight your many good qualities surrounding your lapses, to encourage you to keep getting back on the high road even if you've gone down the low one, and frankly, to tell that inner critic to shut up.
Know that despite your flaws, you are okay as you are. Your flaws, rather than making you “less” of a person, are what make you who you are. What you think of as a defect actually makes you far more interesting to others.
You are not perfect. You make mistakes.
But you are also on a path of growth. Your mistakes and failures help you improve. As flawed as you may be, you must accept yourself, flaws and all, if you are to make progress in your life...
It's Okay to mess up, screw up and break up... Forgive yourself & Move on!
